The Salary Increase Conversation
On a perfectly ordinary Tuesday morning, Alex opened their laptop, sighed dramatically, and stared at the screen like it had personally offended them. The coffee was lukewarm, the inbox was full, and the bank account was doing that thing where it pretends everything is fine while quietly screaming in the background. This, Alex decided, was the day.
Alex had been preparing for this moment for weeks. There were spreadsheets. There were notes. There was even a document titled “Reasons I Deserve More Money (FINAL_v7_REALFINAL).” It contained bullet points like “consistently delivers results” and “kept the printer alive through sheer willpower.” Strong arguments. Solid. Unassailable.
At 9:03 AM, Alex sent the meeting request. Subject line: Quick chat? Casual. Friendly. Not suspicious at all. The waiting began. Time moved differently after that. Minutes stretched. Slack notifications felt louder. Every calendar alert sounded like a countdown to destiny.
Alex rehearsed answers in their head.
“Yes, of course I understand budget constraints.”
“No, I’m not asking for a yacht.”
“Well, actually, if there is a yacht…”
The Moment of Truth
At exactly 11:00 AM, Alex entered the meeting room, armed with confidence and a reusable water bottle. The manager arrived moments later, smiling politely, which Alex immediately interpreted in seventeen different ways. “So,” the manager said, “what’s on your mind?” Here it was. The moment.
Alex launched into the pitch. Achievements were listed. Challenges were mentioned. Growth was highlighted. There was a brief but passionate explanation of how Alex had become “the unofficial glue holding several processes together,” followed by a carefully timed pause. Silence. The manager nodded thoughtfully. Too thoughtfully. The kind of nod that says “I hear you” but also “I will need to consult at least three spreadsheets and possibly the stars.”
“Well,” the manager said, “you’ve definitely been doing great work.” Alex clung to that sentence like a life raft. “But,” the manager continued, and Alex felt their soul briefly leave their body, “we’ll need to review this with HR.” Of course. HR. The mythical department that exists both everywhere and nowhere at once.
Days passed. Alex refreshed their email more often than any human reasonably should. Every notification caused a spike of hope, followed by disappointment when it turned out to be a calendar reminder or a company-wide announcement about a new brand font.
Then, one afternoon, it happened. Subject line: Follow-up. Alex opened the email with shaking hands. “We’ve reviewed your request,” it began. Promising. Very promising. “And we’re happy to confirm a salary adjustment.” Alex stopped breathing.
The next line appeared to take approximately five years to read.
“A 3% increase.” Alex blinked. Three percent. Not zero. Not nothing. Not imaginary. A real number. A small number. A polite number. A number that said, “We value you,” but softly, from across the room.
A victory is a victory, no matter how small.
Alex did some quick mental math. Then slower math. Then calculator math, just to be sure. This increase would cover… groceries. Some groceries. Depending on inflation. Alex smiled anyway. Because here’s the thing about salary increases. They are never just about money. They are about recognition. Validation. The quiet thrill of seeing a number change in a system that rarely changes anything at all.
Alex celebrated responsibly. There was a slightly nicer coffee. Maybe even guacamole, without checking the price. Wild. Later that evening, Alex updated the document. “Reasons I Deserve More Money (FINAL_v8_NEXT_YEAR).” Because the journey never truly ends.